17/10/2022
Let's recap, you cannot just walk away from a customary marriage.
If you have paid lobola for another person, or if another person has paid lobola for you, then you must understand that after residing together, the only way to dissolve that relationship is by divorce issued out of a competent court.
People should understand that a Customary marriage is valid even if it was not registered.
A customary marriage is valid even if lobola was not paid in full.
A customary marriage is valid even if there was no celebration in terms of customary law.
Lastly, as controversial as it has been, a customary marriage is valid even if there was no actual handover of the bride to the groom's family.
I don't care what the academics are saying in theory, but our people should be told the truth.
The fact is that once people engage in lobola negotiations and payment, it is then presumed that a Customary marriage has been entered into.
So after the parties' separation, the families and the parties are treating separation as dissolution of the customary marriage, sometimes they hold meetings which used to be held in custom between the parties' families to dissolve the marriage and to write and sign letters declaring that the marriage has been dissolved.
The law, since the coming into effect of the Recognition of Customary Marriages Act states that all Customary Marriages can only be dissolved by a decree of divorce issued out of a competent court.
But we still find people being adviced that they can just walk away from a customary marriage simply because it was not registered.
Even some Regional Magistrate's court are refusing to hear divorce matters when an unregistered Customary marriage is brought before them. It's unjustified because to get Home Affairs to register a customary marriage needs a court order from the High Court or consent from the other spouse which consent will not be easy to get during divorce.