A Divorce Without Drama

11/01/2024

07/15/2024

Happy Monday morning from the Law Office of Parker Edmiston. Allow me to vent this morning after starting the day with phone calls at 6 AM this morning. If you know someone who needs to see this video please send it to them. We are here to help…even when it’s through gritted teeth.

Law Office 256-258-0834

06/23/2022

How an Addiction Allegation Impacts Child Custody Rights https://vlnk.io/37Y7kZU

06/15/2020

05/31/2019

The best thing about going to a conference with your wife is when she kicks you out of the room after you rustle around like a burglar at 5AM TRYING TO BE QUIET. A loving GET OUT let’s me arrive early to the conference and I have that alone time to get a little work in and I’m first in line at breakfast.

01/19/2019

In many divorce cases, one parent and sometimes both parents find themselves in a battle with a spouse who is actively attempting to alienate the other spouse from their child(ren).

Coping with the Trauma of Parental Alienation

07/30/2018

Our name implies that we don’t have drama in our cases. However, don’t let the slogan fool you. When our client need someone to go to bat for them we’re ready, willing and very able to seek justice! We prepare to win and we always prepare to have a trial. If you decide to mess with our client you may be taking a slow bike ride to your new residence after court. And, you’ll be packing light.

07/05/2017

Custody and visitation is always problematic in divorce settlement agreements. But, if the parents put the needs of the children first, this hurdle can be overcome. In twenty-five years of divorce work as an attorney, we have found 7 simple rules to follow in creating a visitation/custody schedule that works.
Parker Edmiston, Attorney at Law- Scottsboro

Rule #1: Speak no evil.

Don't speak poorly about your ex. Badmouthing the ex will be internalized by the child because they are made up of both you and you. What you say about the ex is what the child will react to, and also think about themselves. Even though you may be upset or mad at your ex, your child still loves him or her as a parent. Regardless of your feelings about your ex - justified or not - keep them to yourself.

Rule #2: It's not about you.

The divorce was about you, but custody is about the kids. Divorce causes emotional tunnel vision and people get so focused on their own hurts and needs that they lose sight of the goal of creating a good childhood.," Custody is not about getting exactly what you want, or even demanding equity at any cost. The hardest part for co-parents is remembering that time with the child is not a prize to be won, but a gift to be cherished. Shared custody works best when both parents set aside their ego and realize that what is best for the child is not always what feels good for you as a parent.

Rule #3: Be realistic about your own schedule and commitments.

Often during a separation or divorce, parents make unrealistic custody grabs based on fear or insecurity. Instead, look at custody as a business arrangement. Remove your emotions from the situation and look at the facts.

Rule #4: Choose a custody arrangement that accommodates your children's ages, activities, and needs.

When deciding on a custody arrangement, you'll want to take the following into consideration.
1. Your children's ages and personalities
2. Your family schedule
3. The career and social commitments of each parent
4. The academic and extracurricular activities to which your children are committed
5. Your child-care arrangements and the distance between the parents' homes.

Rule #5: Find an agreeable way to communicate

For joint child custody to work, communication is key. For the sake of your children (and your sanity), you need to find a method of communication that works for you and your ex. These days we have so many tools with which to organize custody: cell phones, texting and emailing - all which provide parents with the ability to communicate with each other quickly.

Rule #6: Pick your battles.

Let's be frank. Parenting is hard enough on its own, and co-parenting adds another layer of complexity. Prevent as many as conflicts as possible with your ex by open communication, but when disagreements do arise, consider if the conflict is truly worth fighting over. Try to be as rational about your positions as possible and remember that if a judge has to decide it, no one will like the decision most likely.

Rule #7: Let your child feel heard.

A child experiences lots of change during a divorce. Allowing the child to express feelings and confusions about the divorce and custody arrangement can help him feel a sense of control in the midst of all that change. Children need to have input in the process, and depending on how old they are. That can be a simple matter with preteens, or hard to discern with toddlers. Involving your 5-year-old might mean letting him choose which Lego sets he wants to bring to his dad's house. Involving preteens and teenagers in creating a custody schedule can help ensure the schedule meshes with the teen's extracurricular activities.
Let us help you create a plan that works for you and your children. Call our office at 256-259-0834 to schedule your confidential appointment. -Attorney Parker Edmiston

01/03/2017

Today, I have the chance to fight for my client who has been denied visitation again and again by his ex-wife. We are determined to fight the good fight and to restore what should be every parent's goal- maintaining life long bonds between their children and the other parent.

When Visitation is Consistently Withheld

If there is a visitation order that states when the non-custodial parent has access to the child, or even if the order allows for visitation as agreed between the parties, withholding child visitation is a violation of that order and the non-custodial parent can do several things.
In some states, the non-custodial parent can go to the police and have the visitation enforced. However, many police departments do not want to get involved in domestic disputes. Additionally, trying to enforce visitation by the police will create more hostility between the parents, and it doesn't make for happy memories for the child.
The non-custodial parent's next step is to file a petition (legal paperwork) in court to enforce visitation rights. Non-custodial parents may try to file these petitions on their own, but it is advisable to have an experienced family law attorney prepare it.
Some states take failure to comply with a visitation order so seriously that there could be a change of custody, meaning that if the custodial parent consistently refuses to allow the other parent any time with the children, a court may decide to transfer custody of the kids to the non-custodial parent.

Consult an Attorney

Custody is a very emotionally-charged issue, and the laws on child custody can be complicated. So, if your child’s other parent has been interfering with visitation and shows no signs of complying, your best bet is to hire a family law attorney experienced in child custody issues to protect your rights and ensure that you get to spend time with your children.

08/09/2016

Do Not Make These Mistakes In Your Divorce

Don’t Overreact

Perhaps the most important thing you can do in a divorce is to stay calm. When you’re upset, tired, anxious, stressed, or focused on revenge, your ability to make decisions is compromised. When you're feeling calm and rested, you can think rationally and look at how your immediate actions will affect you in the long term. If you can keep a clear head in your divorce and avoid hurling insults, your divorce will probably run smoother and cost less.

Don’t Drain Your Joint Bank Accounts

Be very careful about your spending habits during your divorce case. Specifically, now is not the time to rack up mountains of debt or deplete your life savings on a sports car. In some states, both spouses have a claim to 50% of marital funds, but that doesn’t mean you should try to take your share all at once. If you have to pull out funds from a joint account, do so cautiously.

Some couples enjoy a great working relationship even in the midst of divorce. However, don’t get too eager to settle with your spouse unless you have a written inventory of all marital assets.
Don’t Keep Secrets From Your Attorney

Remember that your divorce attorney is on your side. Your lawyer's job is to advise and protect you in a divorce. Tell your attorney if you have “hidden” accounts, side income, or a criminal record. Your secrets will almost always come out during the divorce process anyway, so it's better if your lawyer knows about them in advance. It's easier for your attorney to plan ahead and take the wind out of your opposing attorney's sails by addressing your issues, than to try and do damage control during a trial.

Don’t Settle Your Case Without an Inventory of Marital Assets

Some couples enjoy a great working relationship even in the midst of divorce. However, don’t get too eager to settle with your spouse unless you have a written inventory of all marital assets. This list should include the following:

jointly and separately-owned real estate
owned or leased vehicles
personal property items of significant value, including household furnishings, televisions, computers, and artwork
bank or credit union accounts, including savings, checking, money market, or bonds
retirement accounts or pensions
brokerage accounts or mutual funds
life insurance policies
business ownership interests
outstanding tax balances or expected refunds, and
debts, including mortgages, credit card balances, car loans, and student loans.
Having a specific inventory of your property to work off of can help you divide assets fairly and prevent fraud. For example, if you reach a settlement agreement with your spouse and later discover a hidden account, you can make a claim for the entire hidden account balance. If you have a clear inventory list, you’ll be able to show that your spouse intentionally failed to disclose the account.

Don’t Give in to Your Spouse’s Requests and Demands

You need to be sure of yourself in a divorce. If you feel overwhelmed by the process or unsure of how to proceed, an attorney can help. It’s important not to let a demanding spouse force you into a settlement agreement or lead you to reconcile if you don’t want to. It’s normal to have moments of doubt and regret during a divorce. Some couples do reconcile during the divorce process, but don’t try to win a spouse back by giving in to unfair requests and demands.

Don’t Let Your Lawyer Make All Your Decisions

A seasoned divorce lawyer can be a real asset in your case. A good attorney can advise you about the long-term impact of your divorce decisions and prepare you for court, depositions, or mediation. It’s important to follow your lawyer’s advice about not stalking your ex or demeaning your spouse on social media. However, it’s also important to not let your lawyer make all your life decisions for you. For example, if you don’t want to keep the marital home or aren’t interested in fighting for sole custody of your kids, don’t let your lawyer push you. Even though your attorney can give you good legal advice, what’s the right decision for one person, may not be right for you. Ultimately, trust yourself because only you know what’s right for your future.

Questions for Your Attorney

What financial information do I need to provide to make my divorce run smoothly?
What would be a fair settlement look like in my case?
I don’t want my divorce to go to trial. I’d like to reach a settlement, but how can I handle my spouse’s bullying?

Call Our office today for an appointment to discuss your case!

Parker Edmiston
256-259-0834