Becker Family Law

05/28/2022

08/27/2021

Spending time with dad may be good for kids’ self-esteem
We often discuss on this blog the benefits of having both parents actively involved in their children’s lives. Divorce can make this much more difficult, of course, but according to a new study, maintaining a good relationship with children in their early adolescent years is especially beneficial. And quality time spent with fathers, the study found, is especially good for kids’ self-esteem.
The study, which was published in the journal Child Development, followed 200 families over a period of seven years, paying special attention to the time kids spent one-on-one with parents. These interactions increased through adolescence and began dropping off again around age 15. Researchers found that the time spent between fathers and their children was especially good for adolescents’ self-esteem; the more time kids spent with dad, the higher their self-esteem. Group time with fathers evidently pays off, too. Adolescents who shared time with their fathers in a setting with other people were found to have better social skills.
These interactions can pay off through little or no delinquent behavior and a lower likelihood to give in to peer pressure, the study says. This social time with dads and kids can also lead to an overall higher self-worth.
The study didn’t find the same benefits from kids spending alone time with mothers, perhaps because the traditional role of caregiver pays off in other ways. (For example, a previous study found that kids who spent more time alone with their mothers were depressed less often.) Traditionally, time between dads and kids is often spent on leisure and social activities with more “peer-like interaction,” the study says, which is important for healthy social development.

08/25/2021

Care and attention better than gifts for kids following divorce
Sometimes, parents feel guilty toward their children following a divorce, which may have given rise to some negative emotions. Often the temptation for parents, whether they have child custody or visitation rights, is to reach for a quick and easy fix by buying children presents, perhaps lavish ones. The truth is that children will benefit more from increased care and attention from a parent than from a gift of the latest electronic gizmo or expensive clothes. Additionally, children often know what is going on, and may think you are trying to buy their affection and approval with bribes.
What children really need is enhanced stability and security. That means making sure that any missing furniture in the household caused by the couple splitting apart is replaced, or the room rearranged to account for it, rather than the children seeing a big gaping hole in the room that reminds them of one parent’s absence. Each parent’s living space should have adequate accommodations for the children, even if they are only occasional overnight visitors rather than living there.
Each divorced parent should encourage the other to become or remain a good parent. It is extremely destructive to do things to undermine this or to try to get children to “take sides” following a divorce.
Children should not be used as the confidants of their parents. They are not adults and should not be burdened with adult worries or concerns. A divorced parent should have other adult friends for support and to discuss problems with. Children need to feel that they can rely on their parents for support and encouragement, not the other way around.
A parent going through a divorce should also consider holding off on re-entering the world of dating until after the divorce is final. At a minimum, children should not be involved in their father or mother’s dating relationships at this early point, as they may find it confusing or disturbing.

08/23/2021

Prenuptial agreements aren’t just for wealthy, anxious couples
Regular readers of this blog may already know that a prenuptial agreement can be a positive undertaking for any couple about to be married, even if they end up staying together until death do them part. While they’re most common among engaged couples with a high net worth, there are plenty of reasons for Texas residents of any income level to consider drafting and signing a prenup.
One reason is that the average for a first marriage is creeping up. And as people are marrying later in life than their older siblings or parents, they’re also typically earning more income by the time they walk down the aisle. With more assets and property to protect, a prenup becomes more valuable for both the bride and groom.
Prenups also offer some emotional protection. No couple enters a marriage with the expectation that it won’t last, but it only takes one or two horror stories about a divorce that went badly for a prenup to start sounding like a wise idea. Couples who want to protect themselves against a potentially years-long battle over their property and assets can rest assured that the stress and heartache that comes with a divorce won’t last any longer than it has to.
If you do decide to enter a prenuptial agreement, it’s wise for both you and your future spouse to take your time with it. It can take a few months to draft an agreement that addresses all your needs, after all. Asking your future husband or wife to sign a prenup on the day of your wedding or even weeks beforehand isn’t advised, and a prenup can be broken if a spouse can prove that he or she signed it under duress or deception.
It’s also a good idea for each spouse to have a separate attorney to represent their best interests. Giving yourself more time will allow your attorney to give you the best shot at signing an agreement you can both live with — even if it’s happily ever after.

08/18/2021

What to do with a house in a divorce
Texas residents and those across the U.S. who are considering a divorce may find it necessary to divide their jointly owned home along with their other assets. This can be a complicated process if proper steps are not taken, as all factors and details need to be considered for the process to run smoothly.
One spouse may wish to buy out the other spouse and keep the home. If this is the case, the spouse who wants to keep the house usually refinances it and cashes out the amount needed to reimburse the other individual. However, there may be a problem if the house has declined in value since the time of purchase. In this circumstance, it may be possible to utilize gift funds from family members to complete the transaction.
Another problem may arise if the spouse who wants to keep the home does not approve for a refinance. When this occurs, the debt stays on the credit report of the other spouse even when that person no longer owns the house. Furthermore, if the spouse who owns the house cannot make mortgage payments on time, it affects the credit of the other individual as well. At this point, it may be best to sell the house or refinance the mortgage to have the other individual’s name removed from the loan.
Sometimes, an individual may want to buy a new house before a separation or divorce has been finalized. While it is best to wait until after a marriage dissolution is complete, this may not always be possible. In this circumstance, the other spouse would need to sign a quitclaim deed that relinquishes their interest in the property.
Keeping a copy of the divorce decree and associated paperwork is a smart idea. When it comes to buying a home later, a lender may need an itemized list of who owns what property. Monitoring credit reports will ensure that debts have been assigned to the correct spouse, and individuals may need to contact creditors directly to ensure this.

08/14/2021

How to avoid the most common divorce mistakes
Some Texas residents who are thinking about divorce may feel hesitant about initiating one out of concern for its possible financial consequences. While there are indeed some mistakes to watch out for, it’s possible to avoid these and achieve a successful outcome with a little planning and forethought.
One of the most important mistakes people make during the divorce process is failing to give a complete accounting of their assets. Although many people are understandably concerned about losing assets during property division, an incomplete disclosure can open someone up to immense financial liability that could cause them to lose the entire asset by default. It’s often better to divulge the asset and develop a strong case for ownership instead.
For similar reasons, spouses involved in a divorce should seek to be aware of one another’s respective tax liabilities. It’s not uncommon for couples to have very different financial prospects, which is why it’s important to bear in mind the potential tax ramifications of those prospects. Furthermore, the law with respect to these matters can change substantially from one jurisdiction to another. Where a person lives can have a great influence on the outcome of procedures such as property division and alimony. It’s necessary to take jurisdiction into account when planning a divorce.
Since these matters can be of such importance for so many people, someone who may be thinking about getting a divorce may want to discuss the situation with an attorney beforehand. It might be necessary to thoroughly review one’s current circumstances in order to determine what the consequences of a divorce might be and how to mitigate whatever harm they might do.

08/11/2021

Texas couples and the benefits of prenuptial agreements
Prenuptial agreements were once believed to be reserved for the extremely wealthy and celebrities. However, in 2013, an American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers survey revealed that 63 percent of divorce lawyers saw an increase in prenuptial agreements. Prenups are becoming more popular among millennials as well as the general population. While most prenuptial agreements were previously used by those with significant wealth or those who were marrying for a second time and wanted to protect assets for their children, modern prenuptial agreements are common among those who are marrying for the first time.
Prenuptial agreements can be simple arrangements stating that each spouse is entitled to keep the property he or she had before entering the marriage. Prenups can also specify that one spouse only gets a portion of the other spouse’s assets if they remain married for a certain period of time. While all states recognize prenups, each state has different requirements for following through on them.
Most people sign prenups because they want control over how their assets will be divided in the event of a divorce. Prenuptial agreements take this decision out of the hands of the court and let couples set their own terms in most cases. It is important to remember that prenuptial agreements do not determine custody arrangements.
Divorce is a complicated process that can be simplified if the couple entered into a prenuptial agreement before marriage. A family law attorney may be able to provide assistance with drafting a reasonable prenuptial agreement that can simplify the asset division process if a couple later chooses to divorce. A lawyer may also be able to assist with the separate issue of child custody, hidden assets and alimony payments.

08/09/2021

Gray divorces: What does this trend mean for Texas couples?
If you are like many other baby boomers in Texas and across the country, the thought of getting divorced may have crossed your mind in recent years. In fact, more than 15 percent of people 50 and older have gotten a divorce recently, according to the results of the 2011 Census Bureau’s American Community Survey. This was a significant increase from the 2.8 percent of people over 50 years old who were divorced 50 years ago.
For years, the overall rate of divorce has stayed relatively stable, hovering around 50 percent or so. And some reports suggest that the divorce rate may be declining. So why are so many more people in this age bracket ending their marriages?
When you think about the factors that are often in play in what researchers are calling “gray divorces,” it makes sense that more baby boomers are opting to end a marriage.
For example, many of these people have been unsatisfied in the marriage for a long time, but have not wanted to get divorced for the sake of the children. By the age of 50, kids have grown up and left the house, giving parents the space they need to make decisions for their own wellbeing.
Life spans are also longer than they used to be. Because people are living longer, there are many more active years ahead of a person after raising a family, returning to work or retirement. Rather than stay in an unsatisfying marriage for that long, many people are feeling as though they would rather spend that part their lives with someone else.
Whatever the reasons are for a couple to make the decision to divorce, it is important that they not be taken lightly. Ending a marriage can be a complicated process, especially when couples have spent many years together building and sharing homes, investments and assets. Untangling all these factors can be tricky, but with legal support, people can work through their divorce and begin the next chapter of their lives.