My Child Advocate, P.A.

My Child Advocate, P.A. My Child Advocate provides affordable, child-centered legal and case management services to children and families.

My Child Advocate is a child and family law center dedicated to helping stabilize families, providing children a voice and advocating for their best interests. We hold the best interest of children paramount and think of your child as our own. My Child Advocate is a professional association created to provide affordable, child-centered legal and case management services to children and families. I

n family custody disputes, parents, caregivers, and even the courts, often lose sight of the best interests of the child. My Child Advocate, through legal representation, guardian ad litem and case management appointments, helps return the focus to the child.

One of the biggest misconceptions about mediation is that it's about meeting in the middle.It isn't.If one parent wants ...
06/11/2026

One of the biggest misconceptions about mediation is that it's about meeting in the middle.

It isn't.

If one parent wants 100 and the other wants 0, the answer isn't necessarily 50.

Good mediation isn't about splitting the difference.

It's about understanding the problem well enough to find a solution neither person could see when they walked into the room.

Sometimes that means compromise.

Sometimes it means creativity.

Sometimes it means helping parents stop arguing about positions and start talking about what they're actually trying to accomplish.

Because underneath most parenting disputes is usually something deeper:

"I want my child to feel secure."

"I want meaningful time."

"I want to be respected as a parent."

"I want to know my child is okay."

When we can identify what people truly need, the number of possible solutions expands dramatically.

The goal of mediation isn't agreement at any cost.

The goal is durable agreements that work for children and families long after the mediation ends.

That's why I love this work.

Not because I help people settle cases.

Because I help people find paths forward.

Coming off presenting on child inclusion at the AFCC Annual Conference, I've found myself reflecting on the conversation...
06/10/2026

Coming off presenting on child inclusion at the AFCC Annual Conference, I've found myself reflecting on the conversations that followed.

One theme surfaced repeatedly:

Should children be included in the process at all?

In an ideal world, I would agree that they shouldn't need to be.

Parents would have the insight, perspective, and self-awareness necessary to fully understand how their conflict, communication, and decisions are impacting their children.

But I don't always work in ideal circumstances.

I work with families navigating hurt, fear, uncertainty, and conflict. Sometimes good parents become so overwhelmed by their own experience that they struggle to see their child's.

And sometimes understanding the child's experience creates the perspective shift needed for meaningful change.

To be clear, child inclusion does not mean asking children to choose.

It does not mean placing adult decisions on their shoulders.

It does not mean making them responsible for the outcome.

Child inclusion can take many forms—a drawing, a story, feelings and needs cards, a carefully facilitated conversation, or developmentally appropriate opportunities for a child to be seen and heard.

I also agree with those who raise concerns.

There is risk.

There is responsibility.

In untrained hands, harm can occur.

These concerns deserve thoughtful consideration.

Which leaves me wondering if the question isn't whether child inclusion is right or wrong.

Perhaps the question is:

When does it help?

When does it hurt?

And how do we ensure that, when used, it truly serves the child?

Those feel like questions worth exploring.

Because at the end of the day, our goal is not to win a debate about child inclusion.

Our goal is to better understand and protect children.

A client recently told me:"I have all this documentation. I can prove how wrong she is. We need to go to court. I need t...
06/08/2026

A client recently told me:

"I have all this documentation. I can prove how wrong she is. We need to go to court. I need to know you'll advocate for me."

I listened.

After he finished, I said:
"What I hear you saying is that transitions are the issue. The conflict around transitions is creating anxiety, stress, and ongoing tension. If transitions were peaceful and predictable, would you be happy?"

He paused.
"Well... yes, but..."

That "but" matters.

Because often what people ask for and what they truly want are not the same thing.

Many people come to lawyers asking for court.

What they actually want is peace.
Or predictability.
Or respect.
Or relief.
Or confidence that their children won't continue to be caught in the middle.

My responsibility is not simply to fight.

My responsibility is to understand the outcome my client is truly seeking and help them evaluate the best path to get there.

So I told him:

"If you believe going to court is the only path that will satisfy you, I may not be the right attorney for you. Not because court is wrong. Sometimes it is absolutely necessary.

But if there is another path that can get you to the same destination with less financial cost, less emotional cost, and less impact on your children, I believe I have an obligation to help you consider it."

He said:
"Well. You've done good for me, Trina. If that's the best path, let's do that."

As professionals, we have influence.

The question is how we use it.
Do we help clients pursue positions?
Or do we help them pursue outcomes?

I've found that when we slow down long enough to understand what someone truly means, not just what they're saying, better decisions often become possible.

Sometimes advocacy means fighting.

Sometimes advocacy means helping someone realize they don't need to.

Traditional therapy and court-involved therapy are not the same thing and treating them like they are can unintentionall...
05/29/2026

Traditional therapy and court-involved therapy are not the same thing and treating them like they are can unintentionally increase conflict instead of reducing it.

Traditional therapy is typically private, voluntary, and centered on the individual client’s growth and healing.

Court-involved therapy exists inside an active legal system.

That changes everything.

In court-involved cases, therapists must navigate:
• ongoing parental conflict
• legal orders and custody dynamics
• informed consent from multiple parties
• confidentiality limitations
• documentation expectations
• potential subpoenas and court testimony
• the impact their words and actions may have on a child and an active court case

As the AFCC Guidelines explain, even appropriate treatment can become harmful if the therapist is not trained to work within the realities of court involvement.

Court-involved therapy requires specialized competence, careful role boundaries, professional objectivity, and an understanding that the therapist’s role is not to become an advocate for one parent or to decide custody outcomes.

The goal is not to “win” a case.

The goal is to support healthier functioning, reduce harm to children, and help families navigate incredibly difficult dynamics with greater stability and clarity.

In high-conflict systems, the difference matters.

A case manager is not a substitute judge.That may sound obvious.But Kansas appellate courts have had to address it direc...
05/28/2026

A case manager is not a substitute judge.

That may sound obvious.

But Kansas appellate courts have had to address it directly.

Case managers can help parents navigate conflict, facilitate problem-solving, and make recommendations when parents cannot agree.

But recommendations are not automatic court orders.

Parents still have the right to object.
To seek review.
To be heard.

Why does that matter?

Because when families feel like decisions are happening to them instead of through a fair process, trust in the system breaks down even further.

The role of a case manager is important.

But so are neutrality, due process, and judicial oversight.

The system works best when everyone understands both the power and the limits of each role.

In high-conflict family cases, one of the biggest sources of confusion is that people often assume every professional is...
05/27/2026

In high-conflict family cases, one of the biggest sources of confusion is that people often assume every professional is serving the same role.

They’re not.

A Kansas Supreme Court Guardian ad Litem is focused on advocating for the child’s best interests through independent investigation and court representation.

A Parenting Coordinator helps parents implement court orders and manage ongoing day-to-day parenting conflict — but cannot substantially change custody arrangements.

A Case Manager facilitates negotiation around custody, residency, or parenting time and may provide recommendations to the court if parents cannot reach agreement.

Different roles.
Different responsibilities.
Different ethical obligations.
Different purposes.

When families and sometimes even professionals misunderstand these distinctions, expectations become misaligned, frustration increases, and conflict can escalate unnecessarily.

Clarity matters.

Not because one role is “better” than another…
but because children are best supported when everyone understands their lane, their purpose, and how the system is designed to function together.

Safeguarding childhoods requires more than good intentions.

It requires aligned systems, informed professionals, and clearer understanding of the roles surrounding families.

Child inclusion mediation matters because children are often the ones carrying the emotional weight of adult conflict — ...
05/26/2026

Child inclusion mediation matters because children are often the ones carrying the emotional weight of adult conflict — while having the least voice in the process.

Too often, mediation focuses only on schedules, logistics, and legal positions. But behind every disagreement is a child trying to make sense of two homes, two perspectives, and the tension between the people they love most.

Child inclusion mediation creates intentional space to better understand the child’s experience without placing them in the middle or asking them to choose sides. It helps parents move from reacting to reflecting. From proving a point to protecting a childhood.

At My Child Advocate, PA, we help families navigate high-conflict dynamics with a child-centered approach grounded in perspective-taking, emotional safety, and healthier decision-making. Through mediation support, child-focused consultation, and tools rooted in the BeH2O® system, our goal is not simply to resolve conflict — it’s to help families make decisions children can actually live inside of.

Because safeguarding childhoods means making sure children are considered not just in the outcome… but throughout the process.

This Memorial Day, we pause to remember and honor the men and women who gave their lives in service to our country.At My...
05/25/2026

This Memorial Day, we pause to remember and honor the men and women who gave their lives in service to our country.

At My Child Advocate, we also recognize the families behind that service — the children, parents, spouses, and loved ones who carry both sacrifice and resilience in ways the world does not always see.

Today is about remembrance.

About gratitude.

About recognizing that freedom has always come at a human cost.

As we gather with family and friends this weekend, may we also hold space for those carrying loss, memory, and pride all at once.

From our family at My Child Advocate, thank you to those who served and to the families who served beside them.

❤️🤍💙

“I already found a therapist.”After recommending co-parenting coaching to a father in one of my GAL cases, that was the ...
05/21/2026

“I already found a therapist.”

After recommending co-parenting coaching to a father in one of my GAL cases, that was the response I received.

And internally, I had one of those:
“…that’s not the same thing” moments.

To be clear:
A therapist is not a co-parenting coach.
And a co-parenting coach is not a therapist.

They are not synonymous.

That does not mean therapy is not valuable. It absolutely can be.

But I recommended co-parenting coaching for a reason.

Because sometimes the issue is not unresolved trauma, anxiety, depression, or emotional healing.

Sometimes the issue is:
reactivity,
communication patterns,
decision-making,
conflict cycles,
and the practical day-to-day functioning of the co-parenting system surrounding a child.

Co-parenting coaching is often future-focused and child-centered.

It helps parents slow things down enough to become more intentional in how they communicate, respond, problem-solve, and show up for their child.

Therapy and coaching can absolutely complement one another.
But they are not interchangeable.

And understanding the difference matters.

Especially for children living inside the system adults are creating around them.

Address

313 North Chestnut
Olathe, KS
66061

Opening Hours

Monday 8:30am - 5pm
Tuesday 8:30am - 5pm
Wednesday 8:30am - 5pm
Thursday 8:30am - 5pm
Friday 8:30am - 5pm

Telephone

+19138298838

Website

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