Hekmat Law & Mediation, APC

09/29/2022

Your marriage certificate can’t fix incompatibility. It’s not even a bandaid.

Don’t oversimplify marriage as a purely romantic phenomenon willed and powered only by love, and completely ignore the financial, cultural, and familial implications at stake.

Marriage is wonderful, but to be successful, you and your partner will have to exercise hard work, honesty, openness, collaboration — and love.

09/27/2022

❤️🌴 Relishing in the tropics with my one and only.

09/22/2022

This can be difficult to pull off if you or your partner don’t have a legal background specializing in premarital law.

The idea behind a prenup is to head into marriage with confidence and peace of mind covering all possibilities. The first step is to talk to your partner and have deep conversations about money, your future, and unforeseen circumstances.

When you feel good about these talks, find the right family law attorney with heavy experience in prenups. It can be as simple as asking, “How many prenups have you created or reviewed in your career?”

Plus, your attorney should have great listening and communication skills to help you achieve your marriage goals, and don’t settle for anything less.

While writing your own prenup in California is possible, you risk having it deemed illegal, invalid, or unenforceable. Having your prenuptial agreement written or reviewed by an experienced California-licensed family law attorney ensures your contract is legal and will hold up in court.

09/20/2022

❌ Don’t wait to get on the same page.

If you wait to have money talks and goal planning, you’re putting off the necessary work needed to build a strong foundation for a long-lasting relationship.

Instead, you’re gambling that things will continue to work out perfectly with the added pressure of now being legally and financially bound.

09/15/2022

👣🌵Exploring the sun-soaked trails in Valle de Guadalupe.

Valle de Guadalupe, Baja California.

09/13/2022

There’s more to this than meets the eye.

The main difference is that you create a prenup before entering a marriage and a postnup only after you’ve tied the knot.

The other big difference comes into play if you’re planning to get married and are deciding whether to get a prenup or wait after marriage to get a postnup.

BOTTOM LINE: Get a prenup. Not only will it be more likely to hold up in court, but you also benefit from having vital talks with your partner about life’s biggest topics NOW.

Otherwise, you’re waiting to discover your partner’s viewpoints once you’re legally and financially bound and run the risk of finding out that you two aren’t as compatible as you thought.

The main difference between a prenup and a postnup is that you create a prenup before entering a marriage and a postnup only after you’ve tied the knot. But there's more to it than just timing.

09/08/2022

Values are not things. Divorce is much more than a property split.

Your values should guide what you must fight for and what to let go of. Maybe you don’t need to spend your precious resources battling for that house plant. Instead, shift your energy towards fair child support and achieving an amicable divorce.

Identify and adhere to your values, take care of your mind and body, stay focused, and look ahead.

09/06/2022

😲 Marveling at the Concours d'Elegance Rodeo Drive car show with the kiddo and Georgie.

09/02/2022

Get these powerful tools to help kickstart a successful marriage.

https://hekmatfamilylaw.com/resources/

These guides are the culmination of over a decade of helping clients build a firm foundation — one based on openness, honesty, and a thorough examination of both partners’ current and future financial picture.

Talking through money and properly planning a prenup build trust and communicative habits that are invaluable to long-term marital success.

08/30/2022

🙅‍♂️ Money is never just about money.

Talk about what money represents, how it was treated in your family, and your relationship to personal finances. Discuss with your partner:

- Were your parents frugal or lavish?
- Did they have large debts?
- How did you view money in your formative years (teens and 20s)?
- Did you work at a young age? How much did you get paid?
- Did your family help you through college?
- Are you accustomed to living with debt or having a sizable savings account?
- Have you made investments? Do you plan to?
- Do you have plans for a big purchase?
- How much money do you want to retire with?

Talk through your money story and cement a solid foundation for financial conversations moving forward.

08/26/2022

😅 In the middle of a never-ending game of fetch with Georgie.

08/19/2022

🤐 Financial infidelity may not seem as obvious or duplicitous as physically cheating, but lying about money can have dire consequences on your marriage.

Partners may conceal finances out of desire to impress or fear of disappointment. Read my latest blog post to understand financial infidelity, why it happens, and how to recover from it.

Let me know what you think.

Money is difficult to talk about, especially with your spouse. However, lying about money in a marriage can have dire consequences. Partners often conceal finances out of a desire to impress or fear of disappointment.