17/11/2019
**THE JOURNEY TO TRANSFORMATION***
Every time I speak to a new person, I am thankful for my life-mission. This concept came to me during the end of my struggles in 7 long years of family court proceedings.
It was a painful, difficult, excruciating situation.
The worst thing was, that the expert help that I got did very little, unfortunately, to move the situation forward.
Professional Agencies- said one thing.
Lawyers said something completely different.
Amongst all of that, it seemed to me that my voice was being silenced and everything was stacked against me. The more I did to try to be heard, the worse things got!
I have never felt more hopeless in all of my life.
However, I dug deep and worked hard to overcome some of my deep emotional trauma and, eventually, slowly, I started to realise my own worth, that I deserve more and that I was not a bad person... The disempowering voices inside of me became silenced and I was able to move forward.
Drawing on my 2 decades of professional case work expertise dealing with thousands of cases of family breakdown, and my own personal insight into the hellish experience of facing family proceedings, I was being approached by strangers who wanted to know more about working with me. One by one I was able to offer them a unique, practical and emotional insight into the inner workings of the system and able to help them succeed in their cases.
This was the birth of this mission, to help one individual and one family at a time to succeed in their lives despite divorce.
This was just the start of the journey, and now....nearly 3 years later, I have built an awesome team who are helping ditch the old way of doing things....(that clearly DON'T WORK!) and are doing things completely differently!
We believe:
1. Divorce is NOT THE END, it's just the beginning
2. Divorce does NOT have to destroy a family - it can be the catalyst to learn amazingly powerful lessons.
3. Children don't have to spend their childhood living in the middle of the "War of Mum & Dad". Despite divorce, children can grow up happy, health and empowered with important life skills and lessons to help them conquer the world!
As you can see, this is not a business. For me, this is a life mission and I know that we are changing lives every single day!
We are here to change lives...one person and one family at a time, from our hearts and with love.
What most people don't realise, is that finding a good lawyer, is not always enough, unfortunately. Even the best lawyers can't help manage the chaotic life their clients have outside of the legal issues. It's not the fault of the lawyer. They do their best, but unless life is managed properly outside of the legal issues during this critical time, all the important work they do, to get the legal resolutions in place, just falls down. Nothing could be more frustrating to a lawyer than a hard-fought perfect court order that falls flat the second a client walks out of court, being breached or badly implemented. An unsupported client can sabotage everything in a split second!
The reality is that these days, family courts are heaving, unable to deal with cases. Pressured beyond capacity.
Judges often simply do not have time to read case files, and if they do, they are so pressured for time, they often have no choice but to rush through hearings.
Family lawyers are also overworked to the point of quitting their professions in droves.
The system is falling apart, leaving individuals, families and especially children, vulnerable to years of pointless conflict.
Having spent long, long days in court with my own case and with clients, I have seen the problem first hand. The hours waiting for a 10 am case to be heard....often waiting around until 2pm to go into court for, perhaps, only 15 minutes and then told to "come back" in a few months.
Parents desperate for things to simply be solved....only to find out that this case will probably keep going in and out of the court system for another 1-3 years.
I know. I was there. I understand. I feel your pain!
What I know, is that the legal part of any divorce is only 1% of the problem. 99% of the issues have NOTHING TO DO WITH THE LAW! If the law was all we needed to solve these problems, then 1 court order would suffice and that would be that. BUT as many of my clients have found out, a court order alone, without a strategy is NOT ENOUGH!
And until you realise that, then you will keep on going round and round and round the pointless conflict cycle.
It doesn't have to be that way.
First of all, know that there is a better way of doing things.
Then...reach out and get the help you need to turn this thing around!
Sending love and support to survivors.
Nabila
