Danelle Els Attorneys

05/05/2026

PARENTAL ALIENATION IN A NUTSHELL

1. What is Parental Alienation?

Parental alienation is considered a concept that can be defined as the intentional or unintentional psychological manipulation of a minor child by one parent, causing the child to unnecessarily fear, disrespect, reject, hate, or distance themselves from the other parent and even from other family members.

Parental alienation is a silent but very serious issue in high-conflict divorces or separations and is globally recognised as a form of psychological abuse, which violates the UN Convention on Children’s Rights as well as the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

To name but a few examples, parental alienation can include negative comments about the other parent, one parent belittling the other, limiting contact between the minor and the other parent, or creating an environment where minors feel they must “choose sides.” Some parents even go so far as to make false allegations of emotional, physical, or sexual abuse against the other parent.

2. Parental Alienation in South Africa

As opposed to countries like Mexico and Brazil, parental alienation in South Africa is not recognised as a specific statutory offence. Although South African courts and legislation are still developing their understanding of the concept of parental alienation and its implications, we can rely on both the Constitution and the Children’s Act 38 of 2005, which make it clear that the best interests of a minor child supersede all and are the top priority in any situation involving minors. Section 7 of the Children’s Act, among various other factors that should be considered when determining a minor’s best interests, specifically refers to the fact that a child has the right to a personal relationship with both parents and family members.

From a legal point of view, this kind of conduct has developing consequences that will come into effect as our courts increasingly acknowledge the impact of parental alienation on minor children.

3. Beyond the Legal Implications

In most cases of parental alienation, the alienating parent fails to realise that the real harm is done to the minor child. Due to the lack of mature reasoning in minors, parental alienation can cause emotional and psychological trauma, which may have both short-term and long-term effects.

3.1. Short-term effects may include:

a. Mental health problems such as severe anxiety, low self-esteem, and depression;

b. Behavioural issues such as substance abuse and aggression; and

c. A distorted sense of reality due to constant pressure and false narratives.

3.2. Long-term effects (in adulthood) may include:

a. Ongoing mental health problems such as depression and severe anxiety;

b. Identity issues and memory confusion; and

c. Relationship dysfunction, including difficulty trusting intimate partners and recognising unhealthy relationships.

In the matter of Richies v Richies 1981 (1) PH B4 (O), the Honourable Judge shared the following view during judgment:

“A parent who unnecessarily deprives a child of the opportunity to experience the affection of the other parent and breaks down the image of that parent in the eyes of the child is a selfish parent, robbing the child of what should be its heritage in order to salve his own wounds. Regrettably, parents wounded by marital conflict often lose objectivity and use as weapons the very children they profess to love more than life itself, causing further harm in the process.”

Although South African law still has a long road of development ahead in relation to parental alienation, it is important for parents going through a divorce or separation to educate themselves on what parental alienation is and how it affects a child’s emotional and psychological well-being. By understanding its effects, parents will be better equipped to identify and avoid harmful behaviours, support the development of healthy relationships with both parents and family members, and ultimately act in the child’s best interests. Well-informed parents are better able to co-parent responsibly, make sound decisions, and ensure stability and emotional security for their children.

Children deserve love, stability, and the freedom to maintain healthy relationships with both parents and extended family members—without conflict, pressure, or guilt.

4. Takeaway

At the end of the day, a divorce or separation ends a relationship between adults, not the responsibility of being a good parent. As legal practitioners, we encourage parents, while the law continues to develop, to rise above personal differences and focus on what truly matters: raising emotionally secure, well-supported children who can thrive as adults.

By Chiné de la Rey – Junior Associate Attorney at Danelle Els Attorneys Incorporated

22/04/2026

Getting Divorced – Don’t Get Trapped into Settlement!!!

Divorce is one of the most significant legal and personal transitions a person can face. When financial constraints make it difficult to appoint an attorney, many individuals turn to settlement negotiations as a quicker and more affordable option. While settlement can be effective, it also carries real risks if you do not fully understand your legal rights.

As a family law practitioner, I often see individuals who entered into settlements without proper advice, only to later realise that the agreement unfairly benefits one party. By then, correcting the situation is complex, costly, and sometimes impossible.

Here’s what you need to know before entering into any divorce settlement.

1. Understand Your Marital Regime:
Your marital regime forms the foundation of your financial rights and obligations upon divorce.
Each regime has different consequences for how assets and liabilities are divided.
Misunderstanding this can result in forfeiting substantial financial claims.
(Please refer to our webpage for more information on marital regimes.)

2. Minor Children – The Paramount Consideration:
Where minor children are involved, their best interests are paramount.
When negotiating a settlement, you must carefully consider:
• Primary residence (where the child will live)
• Contact arrangements with the non-resident parent
• Decision-making responsibilities (education, healthcare, religion)
• Maintenance requirements
• Holiday arrangements and special occasions (e.g. Mother’s Day, Father’s Day)
***Importantly, there is no “one-size-fits-all” contact regime in South Africa.

3. Spousal Maintenance – Know Your Rights:
Spousal maintenance is not automatic. It depends on various factors and is governed by the Divorce Act 70 of 1979.
There are generally two types:
• Rehabilitative maintenance – temporary support to allow a spouse to become self-supporting
• Permanent maintenance – ongoing support (less common and fact-specific)
It is further worthy to know that a spouse can only seek spousal maintenance once during the Divorce, if a spouse failed to seek spousal maintenance, one cannot seek same post divorce.

4. Your Patrimonial Claim
Your patrimonial claim relates to how assets and liabilities are divided.
This includes:
• Immovable property
• Investments
• Pension interests (often overlooked but highly significant)
• Business interests
• Debt allocation

The Danger of Settling Without Advice
Many individuals rush into settlement because they:
• Cannot afford legal fees
• Want to finalise the divorce quickly
• Feel pressured by their spouse
This is where serious mistakes happen.
Once a settlement agreement is made an order of court, it becomes binding and enforceable. Attempting to vary or rescind such an agreement is legally difficult and requires strong grounds.

If you cannot afford an attorney, be cautious about consulting an attorney together with your spouse. That attorney cannot represent both parties’ interests fully.
Instead, consider using a neutral, accredited mediator who:
• Acts impartially
• Assists both parties in reaching a fair agreement
• Ensures informed decision-making
However, even in mediation, it is advisable to obtain independent legal advice before signing any agreement.

Need Advice?
If you are unsure about your rights in a pending divorce or need guidance before entering into settlement negotiations, feel free to contact our offices.
Early advice can make all the difference.
Visit our web page for the full article.

Tel: 012 111 0235 / 079 497 2581
Email: [email protected] / [email protected] / [email protected]
www.deinc.co.za
Danelle Els Nikite Pretorius Chine De la Rey

02/04/2026

Parental leave

In South Africa, there has been numerous complaints regarding parental leave when it comes to the birth of a child as there was unequal treatment when it came to the leave allowed. The Basic Conditions of Employment Act treated parents differently which is in contrast with the constitutional promise of equality. Previously, the law stated that mothers were entitled to 4 months maternity leave while the fathers were entitled to 10 days. In the event of adoption or surrogacy, one of the parties were entitled to 10 weeks of leave.

In a recent court case, Van Wyk and Others v Minister of Employment and Labour, this was changed. According to this case, the provisions of the Basic Conditions of Employment Act violated the Constitutional right to equality and dignity. This was prevalent in that adoptive parents were treated differently than birth parents and mothers and father did not have the same rights.

In the case, the court held that the differentiation amounted to unfair discrimination between mothers, fathers and other types of parents like adoptive and surrogacy parents. The case now resulted in universal parental leave. This means that the four-month maternal leave and the ten days paternal leave is now grouped together as four months and ten days of parental leave.

This case also resulted in leave sharing being an option. This now means that parties can make their own decisions as to how they wish to share their parental leave. Parental leave also no longer differentiates between parents, and all parents are now entitled to the four months and ten days of parental leave which they may divide between them as they wish.

By Nikite Pretorius - Candidate Attorney at Danelle Els Attorneys Incorporated

11/11/2025

Meander kleuterskool pos beskikbaar.. kontak Gilda Ras

09/11/2025

ARE YOU A DIVORCED / SEPERATED PARENT... DON'T LET TRAVEL DISPUTES RUIN YOUR DECEMBER HOLIDAY... HERE IS WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW:

Did you know?

If you’re planning to take your child overseas this December holiday you need to be absolutely clear on your legal position if the other parent doesn’t agree. In South Africa, every parent (or person with parental responsibilities and rights) has a say. If the other parent refuses consent to the trip, you cannot simply travel.

•Section 18(3)(c)(iii) and (iv) of the Children’s Act 38 of 2005 stipulates that a parent or guardian must give consent to a child’s removal from the Republic and to a passport application.
•Section 18(5) provides that unless a competent court orders otherwise, “the consent of all the persons who have guardianship of a child is necessary” to travel outside the borders of SA.
•According to the website of Department of Home Affairs, when children travel (especially internationally), they may be required to produce an unabridged birth certificate and parental-consent letter/affidavit or court order if one parent is absent.

What this means in practice:
•If both parents hold guardianship/parental responsibilities and rights, then both must give written consent for the child to travel abroad.
•If one parent refuses consent without good reason, the other parent may approuch the High Court on an urgent basis and the High Court can grant an order permitting the traveling without the other parent's consent.

Why this becomes a problem at holiday time
•The December holiday period is a prime time for family travel; but if one parent refuses consent at short notice, the other parent may find themselves unable to board the flight, or face delays at passport control or at the border post.

Steps you should take now to ensure that your holiday is not ruined by a parent acting maliciously.
1. At the earliest opportunity, obtain written consent from the other parent for the planned trip, specifying dates, destinations, contact details, accommodation etc.
2. Ensure the child has a valid passport, unabridged birth certificate (listing both parents) where required, and any visa if applicable.

3. If the other parent refuses consent:
o Contact a family lawyer immediately — you may need to bring an urgent High Court application.
o Gather evidence of the plan (itinerary, bookings), your relationship with the child, past holidays, and show that the refusal is unreasonable.
4. Do not assume that because you are the “residential parent” you automatically have the right to take the child abroad without the other’s consent. Courts will examine each case and may impose conditions (return date, contact arrangements etc.).
5. Advise the travelling parent to carry all supporting documentation when departing South Africa (signed consent letter or court order, copies of both parents’ IDs, copy of the child’s birth certificate etc.). This reduces risk of delays at border control.

Do not simply accept that this only applies to international travel!!!! Carefully consider your Divorce order / Settlement Agreement / Parenting Plan - as these documents might also contain certain limitations to traveling with minor children within the borders of South Africa, between Provinces.

Our firm assists parents across SA with Urgent High Court Applications relating to travel consent, relocation and gaurdianship disputes.

Call our office now for a review of your travel plans and if necessary to take immediate steps to obtain a High Court order for your December travelling should it be necessary.

📞 Contact: 079 497 2581]
Email: [email protected] / [email protected] / [email protected]
📍Adress: 314 Glenwood Rd, Lynnwood Park, Pretoria, Gauteng.

By Danelle Els - Family Law Attorney - Danelle Els Attorneys Incorporated.

16/07/2022

15/07/2022

It is with a heavy heart that we have to say goodbye to Dhanele du Preez from our team. We thank you for all the hard work and loyalty towards the firm. We wish you all the best for your future career. Know that you will be missed. Farewell and best wishes. Danelle Els

01/07/2022

TAKE NOTICE: Vacancy available, if all requirements are met, kindly email your CV.

30/01/2020

Thought for the day... so important to let kids still be kids without the worries of adulthood.

09/11/2019

The responsibility of the forensic neuropsychologist is to provide information based on neuropsychological principles that are scientifically validated and relevant to the forensic issue. The focus should not just relate to whether the client has a neuropsychological dysfunction, but if the dysfunction has a causal relation with the injury under investigation.