26/05/2025
Prop Assure Welcome to Eviction #100: 🎉 🥳
Prop Assure vs. The Squatter Syndicate.
In the quiet suburbs of South Africa, a storm was brewing.
Not of weather…
…but of tenants from hell.
It wasn’t personal. It was property.
Let’s break down the villains in this saga:
Rico “Rentless” – 9 months behind, always “waiting for payday.”
Debbie Default – Master of forged pay slips and fake EFTs.
Tony “12 Cats” Maletti – Occupant of 1 flat. Owner of 14 felines. No permission. No shame.
Freddy Fusebox – Rewired the DB board. Denied everything.
And then… the boss villains appeared.
Baron Squatt – Moved in "temporarily." Changed the locks.
👻 The Ghost Tenant – No lease, no trace, no soul. But still there.
Donna O'Reilly When chaos strikes, Donna didn't flinch, she suited up and became the he**in the lease deserved. -Agent Donna a.k.a "The closer".
💀 Lord Arrear – Owes R92,000. Claims “the Constitution protects vibes.”
Together, they called themselves the Tenancy Terrors™.
The property was in ruins. The agent was on the verge.
The owner?
Paying the bond for a property held hostage.
Enter: Prop Assure.
Legal forms in hand. 16-week timeline.
No emotion. Just ex*****on. (The legal kind.)
Each villain fell—milestone by milestone.
✅ Notice Served
✅ Court Secured
✅ Sheriff Booked
✅ Premises Vacated
Tony’s cats? Rehomed.
Freddy’s wires? Cut.
Baron Squatt? Evicted mid-monologue.
On a warm Wednesday morning, we changed the locks, took back the keys, and…
“Gave the landlord back their license to rent.”
(I won't tag this agent 😁)
The queen of Acorn Drive , defeated,
When rent stopped the wine flowed. Sipping Boxed Wine and citing tenant Sovereignty.
Special skills Swinging a broom with Olympic force.
Quoting the constitution (incorrectly).
If Louise had a digital cousin, it would be Trevor Philips from GTA5, equal parts squatter, physcho and property destroyer.
But even Trevor would be out I'm 16-weeks.
Vanessa Coulson Vanessa Sold the property with the squatters still inside, fought the fight, won, if selling under pressure was an Olympic sport, Vanessa would take Gold - no keys needed.
✅ Legal process activiated.
✅ Milestone billing enabled
✅ Furniture refused to cooperate, but the sheriff didnt.
Eviction Day
✅Premises cleared
✅Property recovered.
✅Louise unfollowed us on Facebook.
Evictions #100.
A century of justice. A legacy of peace.
So, to all the upstanding landlords out there:
If you’ve got your own Tony "12' cats, Debbie 'default" Duvel or Lord Arrear (King of late payment)
Don’t panic. Don’t plead.
📞 Call Prop Assure. 071-187-3307
We evict. We collect.
Done.
