Best Conflict Solutions, LLC

26/05/2026

Managers are cracking — and that matters for HR. New post: Managers Are Quiet Cracking Too: What the 2026 Gallup Data Means for HR. If your strategy for the next 12 months doesn’t put managers at the center, you’re missing the real story. Read more: https://wix.to/F0z2h0D

If you read my recent post on the five signs of quiet cracking on your team, here's the part I intentionally set aside for this post. The people responsible for noticing quiet cracking are cracking themselves. If your strategy for the next twelve months doesn't have managers at the center of it, you...

23/05/2026

Quiet cracking is quieter than burnout — and more dangerous because it often goes unnoticed. In our latest post, Kimberly Best breaks down 5 warning signs to watch for and practical steps leaders and colleagues can take to intervene early. Read the full guide: https://wix.to/eiw1IK7

Spot the signs. Support your team. Prevent escalation.

Quiet cracking is the slow erosion of an employee's engagement, confidence, and connection to their work. It's not burnout. It's not quiet quitting. It's quieter than both, and that's exactly what makes it dangerous.

08/05/2026

A few weeks ago I was interviewed by Bruce Horovitz for an AARP article: "How to Cope When You Are Caregiving for Someone You (Really!) Don't Get Along With."

Caregiving dynamics are way more complicated than an article can speak into. Yet beginning the conversations is a critical first step.

If you are in a hard caregiving situation, or know someone who is, you're not alone.
https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/basics/caregiving-not-getting-along/

Read more tips from my perspective as a nurse, a daughter, and a conflict manager here: https://www.bestconflictsolutions.com/post/caregiving-relationships-tips-and-tools-for-the-challenges

A few weeks ago I spoke to AARP for a piece: "How to Cope When You Are Caregiving for Someone You (Really!) Don’t Get Along With," by Bruce Horovitz. That piece is worth reading if you are in a particularly hard situation. What I want to offer here is broader: practical tips and tools for any care...

07/05/2026

I mediate because the process works. People come in stuck. We all get stuck sometimes in conflict and need help finding a better way forward. They leave with a better understanding of themselves, the other person, and the direction they'd like to go. They leave with more clarity and options. And far more often than not, they leave with hope and a plan for a better way forward.
If you would like to talk about whether mediation fits your situation, I offer a brief consultation by phone or video. There is no pressure to move forward. The conversation is just a conversation.

Mediation is a confidential, voluntary process where a neutral third party (the mediator) helps people in conflict have the conversation they have been avoiding and reach an agreement they both choose. The mediator does not decide anything. The mediator does not take sides. The mediator does not giv...

29/04/2026

What does healthcare turnover and burnout actually look like from inside a hospital unit?

I sat down with Jen, an ER nurse with 14 years on the floor (and my daughter), and asked her to tell me honestly what she's seeing. Neither of us scripted it.

The conversation hit on three things every hospital leader should be paying attention to right now:
→ Why nurses feel trapped, even though nursing jobs are everywhere
→ Where the conflict actually comes from (it's not the patients)
→ Why a one-hour annual training does not build a skill

I paired the conversation with the new Missouri Nurses Association data: 90 percent of Missouri nurses reported verbal abuse, 63 percent reported physical violence, and it now costs over $61,000 to replace one staff RN.

The full conversation, the data, and what hospitals can actually do about it are on the blog:

https://www.bestconflictsolutions.com/post/healthcare-turnover-and-burnout-an-interview-with-an-er-Missouri Nurses Association
If you lead a healthcare team, work in HR, or care about the future of nursing, this one is worth your time.

This was the most powerful thing Jen said, and it came unprompted. People assume nurses have flexibility because nursing jobs are everywhere. Jen pointed out the truth. You can move from the ER to urgent care, to oncology, to a clinic, and the same patterns follow you. The verbal abuse, the burnout,...

27/04/2026

RECORDED! THE BOSS WHISPERER interview with Stephen Tolfree was incredible! I'm including some highlights and a link.

"With resentment, you're keeping your finger jabbed in the wound to stop it from healing. When you forgive, you just take your finger out of the wound and allow time to heal."
That's Stephen Tolfree, an executive coach in London whose work sits at the intersection of two things most workplaces don't know how to handle: abrasive leadership and lingering resentment.

I had the chance to talk with him about "boss whispering," the specialized coaching practice for high-performing leaders whose behavior is causing harm. The conversation turned one of my assumptions on its head.

Out of hundreds of the worst-behaved leaders on Wall Street, only two genuinely seemed to enjoy causing harm. The rest? Clueless. Anxious. Unaware of how their behavior landed on the people around them.

Here's the part that really stayed with me: the same behaviors causing harm now are often the behaviors that helped these leaders get where they are. Direct. Demanding. Unflinching. From the inside, their success looks like evidence they're doing something right. That's part of why they're unaware. Their skills worked, until they didn't.

That reframe matters. It means there's a third path between tolerating harmful behavior and firing the person. People can change when the conditions are right.

We also talked about forgiveness as a workplace tool, not as a moral obligation, but as an act of self-interest. A way to stop bleeding confidence, trust, and positivity into a wound we keep open by staying angry.

Worth a watch if you lead people, support leaders, or have ever carried something from work that you couldn't quite put down.
https://youtu.be/KX52aPxAR1s

The Boss Whisperer: Coaching Abrasive Leaders With Stephen Tolfree

18/04/2026

Labels have always terrified me. Not the words themselves, but the fear of being mis-seen. I wrote about why I resist them, what it costs, and why curiosity matters more than categories. I'd love to know your thoughts.
Kimberly Best Margaret Arrowood Phillips Chesterfield Chamber of Commerce-MO

Labels have always terrified me. Not the words themselves, but what comes with them: the fear of being mis-seen. Of having someone look at me and see the label instead of me. Of being reduced to a word I never fully agreed to.

31/03/2026

This Newsletter Edition offers two very unique, free on-line Zoom events with a couple of extraordinary people. The first is with the Boss Whisperer. The second is a Save the Date: April 28, 12PM CST-1:30PM When We're Not Fine: A Conversation About Well-Being for Conflict Professionals with Dr. Amey Aubry, PhD, MAOM , a well-being mentor, mind-body and energy balance practitioner, and PhD with nearly 20 years of experience in acupuncture, energy medicine, and integrative modalities.

Also, I give my thoughts on "Why Leadership Development IS Conflict Management Training"
As always, looking forward to your feedback.

Wednesday, April 22, 2026 12:00 PM CT / 1:00 PM ET / 6:00 PM BST When I met Stephen Tolfree and learned about Boss Whispering, I knew this had to be a conversation. Can abrasive leaders really change? Stephen says yes, 83% of the time.

25/03/2026

Want a real challenge? Change how you see people who are different than you and how you show up at those times.
Perusing Ken Cloke's mediation training manual today and this did not show up - it jumped out. Thoughts?

25/03/2026

I had the best time sharing conflict management tips with Chesterfield Chamber of Commerce-MO What a robust and lively conversation!

22/02/2026

Super excited to be hosting a 4hr Workshop for the National SHRM conference. Also super excited (and grateful) that National SHRM has placed a second order of Best Conflict Conversation Cards: Workplace Edition in their national bookstore. Imagine, not only HR managers, but entire teams being Conflict Competent - having the space to hold hard conversations and to disagree productively. Imagine if we ALL learned how to do that. Hope to see you there! Kirkwood Des Peres Area Chamber of Commerce

This June, I’ll be in Orlando leading a 4-hour pre-conference workshop at the SHRM Annual Conference, the largest gathering of HR professionals in the world. (Oprah’s keynoting this year, and I’m excited!) My session is called “From Fixer to Facilitator: Mediation Skills Every HR Professiona...